Sobre a importância do protector solar

Reza a lenda que o texto que se segue é mesmo o discurso de final de ano lectivo de um professor de uma escola secundária norte-americana. Verdade ou mito urbano, não faço ideia. Fiquei a conhecê-lo por causa de um vídeo que passava insistentemente na MTV, com o nome “Everyone's Free (To Wear Sunscreen)”. No lugar geralmente destinado ao nome do artista, podia ler-se “Baz Luhrmann”, mais conhecido como realizador de “Romeu+Juliet” e “Moulin Rouge”. O vídeo sempre me intrigou, sobretudo por nem sequer se tratar de uma música, ficando assim tão deslocado de toda a pop cor-de-rosa que passava na MTV. Todo o discurso era dito em tom monocórdico, com uma tímida batida de dança por baixo. Consistia numa listagem de conselhos que deviam ajudar os finalistas daquele ano a prepararem-se para a vida no mundo real. Mas o narrador fazia a ressalva: “De tudo isto, a única coisa de que tenho a certeza é de que devem usar sempre protector solar”. Às vezes dou por mim a rir sozinha quando uma destas frases me volta à memória sem pedir permissão. E me ajuda a colocar os ditos "problemas" numa outra perspectiva. Uma perspectiva, se quiserem, mais preguiçosa. Porque os verdadeiros problemas, afinal, resumem-se a uma embalagem de plástico de cores garridas à venda em qualquer supermercado. Ah, então afinal até nem dá assim muito trabalho...

Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of '97.
Wear sunscreen. If I could offer you one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience... I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth; oh, nevermind, you will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now, how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are NOT as fat as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. The real troubles in life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing everyday that scares you. Sing. Don't be reckless with other peoples hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours. Floss. Don't waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long, and in the end, it's only with yourself. Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements. Stretch. Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't.

Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees, you'll miss them when they're gone.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40. Maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary.... Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either - your choices are half chance, so are everybody else's.

Enjoy your body, use it every way you can... don't be afraid of it, or what other people think of it... it's the greatest instrument you'll ever own. Dance... even if you have nowhere else to do it but in your own living room. Read the directions, even if you don't follow them. Do NOT read beauty magazines they will only make you feel UGLY.

Get to know your parents, you never know when they might be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings; They're your best link to your past, and the people most likely to stick with you in the future. Understand that friends come and go, except for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but, leave before it makes you soft. Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths. Prices will rise, Politicians will philander, you too will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble, and children respected their elders. Respect your elders. Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you'll have a trust fund, maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia; dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts, and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.